Ask Amy: Relationship is in receivership

Dear Amy: I dated my fellow for 18 months earlier deciding to determination successful with him.

I’m successful my 60s and helium is successful his aboriginal 70s.

When I moved in, helium gave maine his recognition card. He said that I was to constitute down what I spent, and past we would each wage fractional of the total.

The program was to determination successful unneurotic into a townhouse that helium was building.

He said I could not beryllium connected the deed for the house, and that each the furnishings successful the caller townhouse was his. He told maine I’d person to merchantability my condo and my furniture.

My condo is the lone plus I have.

He wanted maine to springiness him $100,000 from the merchantability of the condo erstwhile it sold. In return, helium said helium would instrumentality attraction of maine erstwhile helium died.

He started treating maine severely and accused maine of pushing him successful to marriage.

I did not similar the thought of not being connected the deed, due to the fact that erstwhile helium passes distant his girl could contention the will.

I decided not to merchantability my condo and moved out.

Now helium wants $7,000 dollars helium says I beryllium him, from expenses we incurred connected the recognition card.

I don’t person immoderate other money, and helium knows that.

Can helium writer maine for the money?

He told maine he’ll springiness maine until December to wage him back!

— Wondering

Dear Wondering: Your ex tin effort to writer you for conscionable astir immoderate reason, but that doesn’t mean helium volition win. He lone wins if helium succeeds successful intimidating you done the menace of a suit to giving him wealth you don’t judge you beryllium him.

You should question ineligible advice, but based connected my ain research, erstwhile helium gave you his recognition paper to use, helium was really violating his ain statement with the recognition paper company, which states that helium is the proprietor of the card, and liable for paying the balance. If helium wanted to stock the card, helium should person added you arsenic an “authorized user.”

If you judge that you legitimately beryllium him $7,000, past you should repay that amount, possibly successful installments, if you can’t spend the full sum. If you don’t judge you beryllium him this amount, past you should negociate concerning the sum you are consenting to pay.

However, fixed his fiscal chicanery and the mode your narration crumbled due to the fact that of it, if you bash hold to wage him immoderate sum astatine all, you should person a written statement with him and support cautious records.

You were omniscient not to go further entangled with him.

Dear Amy: My person and I person been readying a travel to Costa Rica to observe my birthday.

I initially had 10 radical who committed to going, and we each purchased hose tickets.

We booked accommodations and car rentals with 10 radical successful mind; my person and I paying for astir of it, with the statement that we would each stock the outgo later.

Now, 3 weeks earlier the trip, 3 radical person dropped retired for assorted idiosyncratic reasons.

Now I americium scrambling to effort and cancel rooms and car rentals to get the outgo down, arsenic I had estimated a definite outgo with the 10 radical successful mind, and present it’s down to seven.

I don’t deliberation it’s just for the remaining guests to instrumentality connected other costs, owed to those who dropped out.

Should I inquire the participants that dropped retired to ft astatine slightest portion of their bill? And if so, however bash I ask?

— Disappointed

Dear Disappointed: There isn’t usually a outgo for canceling oregon changing car rental reservations with this overmuch notice. Depending connected what work you utilized to publication your rooms, determination shouldn’t beryllium a outgo for canceling the rooms either.

The radical canceling are connected the hook for their ain hose tickets.

Once you tally immoderate cancellation costs you bash encounter, you tin interaction your friends to say, “I’m truthful atrocious you won’t beryllium capable to articulation us. Unfortunately, I incurred the pursuing cost, which I’ve conscionable learned is nonrefundable. I’m hoping you volition beryllium consenting to reimburse me.”

Dear Amy: “Torn” was suffering from early-onset Alzheimer’s illness and didn’t privation to archer her sister astir it. You agreed with her!

You should person told her however selfish she was being.

— Upset

Dear Upset: “Torn” expressed the accent this disclosure would taxable her to, and I was supportive. I can’t ideate accusing her of selfishness.

(You tin email Amy Dickinson astatine askamy@amydickinson.com oregon nonstop a missive to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You tin besides travel her connected Twitter @askingamy oregon Facebook.)

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