3 years ago
360
Dear Amy: My hubby and I person 2 granddaughters whom we cherish.
I americium increasing progressively acrophobic with the behaviour of their parents toward the youngest one.
“Camille” has ever been the “drama queen.”
If she didn’t get her way, she pitched a acceptable and her parents acquiesced.
As she got older, they catered to astir each whim and astir ever deferred to her.
Camille has refused to get the COVID vaccination and her parents volition not importune connected it.
She is simply a young big and I deliberation her parents tin and should amended her connected the necessity of getting the vaccination and request that, arsenic agelong arsenic she is surviving with them and they are paying her mode successful life, she indispensable comply for her information and the information of those astir her.
Our different granddaughter is fixed “a backmost seat” to her sister.
Any suggestions arsenic to what, if anything, tin oregon should beryllium done?
— Concerned Granny
Dear Granny: The champion portion of being a grandparent is besides occasionally the astir frustrating part: You are not the parent!
Yippee! You don’t person to woody with the regular worldly and nonsense of mundane parenting.
You person each close to stock your ain invaluable position connected parenting with your ain children, but you can’t marque them travel your ain common-sense advice.
Now that these 2 grandchildren are older, it is due for you to dainty them individually, to forge much adultlike relationships with them, and to respond with proportional consequences regarding their behaviour – without resorting to “drama.”
So, if “Camille” refuses to beryllium vaccinated, you tin explicate to her wherefore this is indispensable and however her vaccination presumption could person a nonstop interaction connected you.
If she continues to garbage the vaccine, you apt are not going to privation to walk clip successful proximity to her.
That’s the logical effect of her choice.
If the different granddaughter is much cooperative, funny successful others, vaccinated, and easier to beryllium around, past you are going to forge a person narration with her. I suggest you befriend her.
Dear Amy: I americium penning successful effect to “Not Me, Too” whose antheral person groped a pistillate she knew.
I subordinate to the groping unfortunate successful this story.
When my fiancé and I archetypal began dating, his champion person groped maine soon aft we met.
I mentioned it to my boyfriend, and helium brushed it off, saying that his person is “physically affectionate with everyone.”
Well, erstwhile the #MeToo question rolled astir the pursuing year, it each came backmost to me, arsenic good arsenic immoderate whispers of the person being “overly affectionate” with different women successful our group.
Even though I had go friends with my boyfriend’s person by this time, it inactive upset me.
I told my fellow that helium needed to speech to his friend. He did. He took him retired for drinks and explained that his actions had wounded people, and if helium continued, we wouldn’t beryllium capable to socialize with him anymore.
It was a pugnacious conversation, but successful the end, his person thanked my fellow for confronting him. He said helium wasn’t alert of conscionable however hurtful his actions had been.
He apologized to me, arsenic good arsenic a fewer different women. He went to therapy. He changed.
Since that time, helium has talked openly astir the acquisition arsenic a mode of keeping himself accountable and passing connected the acquisition to different guys.
We inactive number him arsenic 1 of our closest friends.
— A #metoo Success Story
Dear Success Story: It is astir intolerable to judge that anyone mightiness NOT recognize however gross and violative groping different idiosyncratic is, but I’m gladsome that your person was forced toward awareness.
Dear Amy: I’m penning astir the pistillate that claims her boyfriend’s person grabbed her down 10 oregon 20 years agone and a fewer times since, and felt it indispensable to marque this feline a intersexual predator connected Facebook by tagging it #MeToo.
I ran this by my woman of 35 years, and we were some funny wherefore the pistillate didn’t respond each clip with a large “Quit grabbing my behind!” and, arsenic I person taught my daughter, if needs be, poked him successful the oculus with her fingernails?
Embarrassing him and sending him to the optometrist would person astir apt stopped immoderate aboriginal unwanted groping.
— Just Sayin’
Dear Just Sayin’: Not each radical are capable to respond to battle by countering the assault.
Your precise glib effect is portion of the problem, successful my opinion.
(You tin email Amy Dickinson astatine askamy@amydickinson.com oregon nonstop a missive to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You tin besides travel her connected Twitter @askingamy oregon Facebook.)
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