Ask Amy: Flight or fight? These passengers choose both.

Dear Amy: On a abbreviated airplane flight, I was seated adjacent to a pistillate who chatted to maine nonstop astir this and that, portion I listened and smiled politely.

When she started to dependable opinions that I didn’t stock and didn’t privation to discuss, I tried to wrapper up the speech and turned to my phone.

I texted my girl an unkind remark astir the woman, which the pistillate saw; she would person had to marque an effort to spot what I was writing.

The pistillate became upset, and I felt terrible.

I apologized profusely. The formation attendants adjacent got involved.

We were some soundless for the remainder of the flight.

At the clip I chastised myself for penning thing snarky astir my seatmate, but the much I thought astir it, I wondered if I needed to consciousness truthful bad.

After all, the remark had not been directed astatine her and she took it upon herself to work a backstage communication.

What bash you think?

– Testy Traveler

Dear Testy: Your seatmate failed to “read the room,” but immoderate travelers are tense oregon excited and take to distract themselves done chatter (I person present trained myself to respect my seatmate’s privateness until astatine astir 10 minutes earlier landing).

Your seatmate besides failed to work you, arsenic idiosyncratic who knows however to grin and enactment politely without really being polite oregon kind.

You person the close to deliberation immoderate snarky thoughts you mightiness have, but erstwhile you perpetrate them to writing, your thoughts volition instrumentality connected a beingness of their own.

No, she should not person work your text, but she did work it. (I’ve seen this referred to arsenic “shoulder surfing,” and you’ve astir apt done it, yourself.)

Your question to yourself should be: “Should I person written the substance successful the archetypal place?”

If your mediate schoolhouse kid reported to you that she wrote a snarky enactment astir a chap classmate, but the classmate intercepted it, work it, and responded badly, would you promote your kid to warrant her ain actions the mode you are doing?

Generally speaking, if you consciousness atrocious astir your ain behavior, past spell up and thin into that feeling, due to the fact that determination is simply a precocious likelihood that you behaved badly.

If you privation to determination done a satellite that is gentler, much respectful, and kinder, past the amended behaviour mightiness arsenic good commencement with you.

And – portion I’m astatine it – fto america admit the often thankless relation of formation attendants, who are determination to spot to our safety, but extremity up utilizing their invaluable clip and vigor negotiating this benignant of nonsense.

Dear Amy: I accidental this is simply a insignificant matter, but I’ve mislaid interaction with immoderate precise adjacent friends during the pandemic. Honestly, I was conscionable feeling down (fortunately, not sick). I wouldn’t picture it arsenic depression, but much arsenic conscionable not having immoderate energy.

I’m feeling overmuch amended now, but I’m a small unsure astir however to prime up the pieces of these friendships.

Any suggestions?

– Distant

Dear Distant: I judge that your concern is apt highly common, arsenic galore of america look to person been successful a authorities of torpor.

I prescribe … postcards!

Write retired a sincere message. Here’s a start: “Dear Friend, I’m sending this postcard from my couch, wherever I look to person spent the past twelvemonth oregon so. I americium truthful atrocious that I look to person fallen disconnected the borderline of the world, but I americium emerging now. I anticipation you volition forgive maine for not being successful touch, and I americium crossing my fingers that you’ll inactive instrumentality my calls, truthful we tin resume wherever we near off.

I’ve thought of you truthful often, and genuinely “wish you were here!”

Dear Amy: “Worried Dad” was acrophobic astir his 9-year-old lad due to the fact that the boy’s parent (Dad’s ex), commented that helium was “getting a belly.”

As a retired K-8 schoolhouse nurse, I was keenly alert of the kids’ assemblage images during puberty. I’d similar to punctual radical that this lad is adjacent the prepubescent property erstwhile children often summation value and go chubby earlier the maturation spurt of puberty, aft which they usually instrumentality to their much mean value pattern.

This could beryllium a teaching infinitesimal for the Dad, and a mode to assistance his lad consciousness OK.

Maybe an knowing dada volition assistance bolster the lad against mom’s crisp tongue.

– Former School Nurse

Dear Nurse: I admit your insightful “diagnosis.” Thank you!

(You tin email Amy Dickinson astatine askamy@amydickinson.com oregon nonstop a missive to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You tin besides travel her connected Twitter @askingamy oregon Facebook.)